7.01.2005

8 months under our belts

bella turned 8 months somewhere between yesterday and today (since there isn't a 31st to really mark it) and I am overwhelmed by how much she's made our lives better. I love watching her interact with trent, sean, and anyone else who visits. she's a happy, loving baby, vocal - I swear, I'm going to realize the full potential of this at some point around age 10 - and sweet.

when I place her in my lap, she fills the whole area up...when she was just a newborn, I remember thinking that it wouldn't be long until she was up and running around and here we are, 8 months later, and it's gone by in a blink of an eye.

a short time before bella was born, sean's coworker and his wife had twin boys, who were born too early. it was touch and go for a while, and then little connor got to come home. he thrived. he's passing all the same milestones as bella - and is nearly the correct weight for his age. but poor ryan was not able to leave the hospital and had to have more surgery. he didn't gain weight. he didn't thrive. and yesterday, he finally let go.

the significance to us of his passing on bella's 8 month birthday was that we went numb. only now am I really allowing the emotion of what it would be like to lose this part of our life to creep into my head. and I am swatting it away as quickly as possible because I don't want to ever imagine my life without either of my kids.

we are sending flowers for ryan. we don't know what else to do. but we're going to cherish our children no matter if they are crying, pooping all over us, forgetting to feed the pets, eating too much junk food, or anything else. and I hope in some way, that honors ryan's memory.

5 validations:

NME said...

Heartbreaking. Seriously heartbreaking. My heart goes out to their family. I wish there was more to say or do, but there isn't. So painful.

TD said...

Happy birthday, Bella. May you always know how loved you are by your family, friends (even those who don't get to see you often enough), and most of all, your mom and dad. They are so lucky to have you in their lives, and you are so very lucky to have them as your parents.

lonna said...

Happy 8 months to you Miss Bella and to your parents for getting to enjoy you for that long. Dermot was 8 months when Bella was born. I remember that that is when things started getting really fun because he just started sitting up at that late date.

Regarding Sean's coworker, that's just so sad. I honestly can't even fathom it. I have always told Ethan that if anything ever happens to Dermot that he should take me right to the psychiatric ward.

Missuz J said...

I can't even let a small portion of my brain consider not having Sophie. Happy 8 months Bella.

Kodi said...

Celebrate every moment with your child. Enjoy each smile, laugh, temper tantrum, and crying fit. Happy 8th month little beauty.