Firewords on the Horizon

Happy 4th of July, everyone! Sean here at work (as usual on a weekend) this holiday weekend dropping you a post when I should be gathering more information to ace my test. That's in two weeks, and next week, I'm off to Atlanta, GA with friends. So, this is the last work week I have before I'm REALLY feeling the flames of test pressure. I know. I'll do fine, but it's the anticipation that Carly Simon sang about and the waiting being the hardest part as mentioned by Tom Petty that is killing me. I just want it behind me so that I can just get on with being an analyst instead of an operator. What will be the difference? Cha-ching!

A few things.

First, since Patrice set me up to tell the story, I have to tell it. When Bella was at the bottom end of her constipation mountain last week, I was feeding her her lunch bottle. She gave me zero indication that she was having a bowel movement. Instead, she drank her bottle with no grunting, squirming, or other signs of a fecal-related struggle. When she finished her bottle, I let her crawl all over me, which she likes to do lately. We call it climbing "Mt. St. Mommy" or "Mt. St. Daddy". Anyway, having no idea that she blew out her diaper, I knew that she was due for a change, so I picked her up and laid her on the changing table. While doing so, I noticed a dark brown paste on the inside of my right elbow. At first, I was worried that it might have been blood. Using my sense of smell, I deducted that it came from Bells nether region. Then, my sense of sight picked up on smeared poo on my shorts and shirt. The locations: right leg, right pectoral, left rib cage. Trails left behind on her Mt. St. Daddy expedition. Unfortunately, I was wearing a powder blue Cave In t-shirt which is now permanently stained after two consecutive washing cycles. I guess it's permanent now. The evidence goes along with the memory.

Don't hate me. It seems that guys just lose weight faster than girls. I think it's because guys generally eat more, so naturally, if they cut back, they will lose weight faster. Anyway, in accordance with the documentation of my attempt to lose weight (I'm stalling, aren't I?), I lost 5 pounds in a week, which floored me because I don't look different. I definitely feel better, and that's what's important. It's the whole point of why I'm doing this, and it seems to be working. So, as of July 3, I am now 225 instead of 230, which makes me happy.

I won't have a post next weekend because I'll be away (probably drinking beers and eating southern BBQ), so I don't expect the same weight loss results. Well, we'll see how it goes.

3 validations:

Missuz J said...

It's easy to fight back the jealosy(sp!!) I feel for your weight loss when I imagine you smeared in poo. Congratulations.

patrice said...

and I lost a pound. one. measley. pound.

ah well.

NME said...

Easier weight loss is one of the VERY few advantages men have over women.